This isn’t a typical post. I wasn’t planning on going anywhere today or doing anything except plopping down in front of a computer to work on final papers for my classes. But then as I was walking to class, someone stopped me to say that a friend of mine and fellow grad student, Silvia, passed away last night. Apparently she was in her night class when she had a heart attack and died instantly. I was in complete shock. Silvia and I started grad school at the same time and though she was in the Literature program and I in Linguistics, we worked the Spanish Lab together several days a week and chatted about almost everything.
After I received the news, I still had to go and teach class; it was too late at that point to cancel. I was fine until the second half when I gave my students an exam. Then it just kind of hit me: Silvia was supposed to be giving her class an exam today too. She won’t be in the Lab any more to commiserate and joke with. She won’t be in those incredibly boring staff meetings where we all pretend to pay attention, but are really checking Facebook and email. I just about lost it right then and there in front of my class, but managed to hold it together until the last student had left, at which point it was like the dam breaking and flood waters bursting out.
Anyone who knows me, knows I can’t stay still when I’m upset – it’s like I have ants crawling under my skin and have to get away as fast as humanly possible. So I did what I do when I’m upset: drive.
After who knows how long in my car, I ended up at Young Park, one of the 30+ parks in Las Cruces. The weather was not ideal day for a day at the park; it was overcast, dusty and incredibly windy, but today it worked. I walked around the park, wind gusting, with my camera. I just took pictures of anything and everything while walking on the track until I could deal with the world again. The park isn’t the biggest or most beautiful, but it sufficed.
Vaya con Dios, Silvia. Te queremos.